Monday, July 28, 2014

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye

Last week, I had the misfortune of attending the funeral of my last remaining grandparent. Funerals are never easy, and this one sucked as much as I expected. It really got me thinking about death, funerals and obituaries. I think the digital age is the death knell of funerals and obituaries as we know them.

Obviously, I knew of my grandma's death and flew to Milwaukee to be with my family. But during the wake I marveled at the number of people who said something to the effect of, "I read of your grandma's death in the obituaries..."

Obituaries. Something I haven't thought of in ages. Something I never had read regularly, and certainly not at all since I started getting my news online. Something I honestly don't see myself delving into again.

It's pretty obvious that newspapers are dying and most of the content lives online. But online obituaries are hidden. They're not on most publications' home pages or even available as a tab to click. You actually have to perform a search to find obituaries. To me, that signals the end. It now seems impossible to sustain any type of business without a strong internet presence and ease of use. We're no longer patient enough to jump through hoops to get to our content.

I currently don't read the obituaries in any form. Hearing so many people at my grandma's wake speak of the concept really made me question future attendance at funerals once we lose the paper-reading generations. I realized I never would know my friends' or colleagues' loved ones had passed unless it were posted on social media.

There is something so special and heartwarming about others showing up to pay sympathy. For three full hours, the line at my grandma's wake was out the door. In 90 degree heat. I know the support meant a ton to my dad and his brother and sister. I saw people I hadn't spoken to in decades and I couldn't believe they stood in line for up to an hour (especially in the heat) just to pay their respects to people they hadn't seen in years.

That practice may be lost on younger generations. If we don't post the loss on social media and we've shunned traditional media like newspapers, how will we know to offer support? Will funeral homes and churches see fewer and fewer people for funerals because we're uninformed?

I really don't know the answer and welcome your feedback. Let me know how you see it, by leaving a message in the comments section. Will family and friends find some other way to learn of loved ones' losses? Will attendance at wakes and funerals dwindle and eventually make them obsolete? Will attendance somehow remain steady? I'm curious to hear your thoughts.

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