Houston, We Have a Problem

Although it is a natural part of the life cycle and something we can all expect at some point, death is never easy to deal with. Living through the loss of a loved one conjures a plethora of feelings--most of them negative. Nearly all of us have dealt with a soul-crushing loss that rattled us to our inner beings. I can say with a fair amount of certainty, that for the vast majority of us, that loss was not the passing of Whitney Houston.

A death is always tragic. But we might be going too far with Houston's.

So why are so many people mourning her death as though it were a close personal friend who passed? The same scenario played out when Michael Jackson died, and it leaves me utterly befuddled. The losses, while unfortunate, are not worthy of random fans wailing in the streets, blubbering through tears on TV, and suddenly acting as though Whitney Houston were the most important thing since the invention of the internet.

It's an incredibly unfortunate loss, but I'd like to curb overuse of the word "tragic" to describe Houston's situation. I reserve that term for inexplicable, intensely sad instances like a small child being murdered or a good person dying while trying to help someone else. I have much difficulty using the word for celebrities with odd ego issues who repeatedly fall into drug or alcohol hazes. I'm not insinuating that battling a drug or alcohol addiction is easy, because I recognize it's anything but. Average folks struggle with these demons on a daily basis. However, Hollywood seems to be rife with the types of personalities who revel in the crazy strung-out lifestyle, then express surprise when they're "suddenly" hooked on substances. We hear stories ad nauseum of substance abuse in Hollywood, but few positive stories of seeking help and successful recovery. Sure, maybe artistic types possess more of a natural proclivity to addiction. But with the multitude of avenues for getting help, it seems remiss to allow oneself to venture into such a destructive lifestyle. Not to mention, downright careless to ignore the numerous stories of such lifestyles leading to the demise of countless celebrities.

Isn't it sad, perhaps even pathetic, that the first thing so many of us ask when another celebrity dies is "what drugs was s/he on?" Yet there's no concerted effort to cease the practice. Currently much ire exists for celebrity doctors who assist their "patients" with acquiring drugs, then stand by idly as said drugs are used to excess and used in lethal combinations. But the half-hearted effort to end this abuse is a facade. We, as a society, gobble up the latest celebrity gossip, gorge on it, belch to make room, then beg for more when we find a void in our own lives. We choke on the stories that are just too much--like child abuse--and push them away. But something as juicy as a crazed celebrity going on a drug-induced rampage, possibly even one that ends fatally? More, please! People, we are disgusting.

I must say, for the most part I do not buy into the celebrity culture. I'm not attempting to be holier than thou, I just prefer to partake in my own wild adventures rather than living vicariously through someone I do not know at all, but for forking over my $12 to see their movies or buy their records. I think this sentiment became more cemented in my head once I began working in TV news. Watching the reporters and anchors field repeated harassment when they simply desired a night out with friends often proved too much for me to handle. Having to stand idly by while person after person comes up to share life stories, get a picture, and perhaps even try to touch the "celebrity"... well I find that ludicrous. I adore my anonymity and when I encounter celebrities I prefer to let them have some peace. I enjoy movies, TV shows and music as much as the next person, but I also realize the art of doing these things is a job. I certainly wouldn't want to endure constant questions and comments about my job when I'm away from work. Sure, these people put themselves in the spotlight by choosing an unusual type of business, but the public often draws no line between reality and fiction. Many exhibit no common decency when approaching someone famous and think because the person is a public figure, anything goes--even sometimes verbal abuse. I do believe it's the constant badgering and constantly having to be "on" that drives some celebrities batty.

But I digress. Back to Whitney Houston. Anyone who is truly surprised by the outcome needs a small slap upside the head. I don't mean to judge her or to prematurely characterize the situation as a run of the mill celebrity overdose. Any variety of scenarios could absolutely exist. However, I believe non-overdose scenarios to be unlikely. Unfortunately, Houston will likely be yet another in an ever-growing string of celebrities who live forever in history as someone who succumbed to substance abuse.

Some fans are dismayed that Houston's family chose a private funeral, and that there will not be a large, public ceremony. But never fear. There will be opportunities to watch the whole display on the internet. Look, this is not some sort of concert to be followed online and sung along to, this is a human being's funeral. Normal people dread attending funerals, so why are scores of people enamored with the prospect of watching one on the internet? It's morbid. Let that family grieve privately as they requested. And now there's news that Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey has authorized the flying of American flags at half staff on state buildings in Houston's honor. Are you kidding me??!! This is an honor typically reserved for recognizing fallen heroes who served our country, be it in the military, on a police force or as a firefighter. While Houston may have been influential in her own way, she absolutely does not deserve the honor. It's an insult to all who have received the half staff honor--such as the firefighter here in my area who is being buried today because he fell from I-395 while fighting a car fire. Flags are flying at half staff for him in my neighborhood. But Whitney Houston? Personally, I find the whole thing, from funeral to half staff, disgusting and offensive.

Whitney's demons ultimately claimed her life.

Was her music beautiful and inspirational? Absolutely. But where were all these people proclaiming their love for Houston just two weeks ago? Probably calling her a whacked out crack whore and not listening to the dusty CDs of hers lying in the back of the closet. Who supported her when she was sorting through hard times in the public eye? Certainly not all of these people now weeping at her death. Remember that reality show she did with then-husband Bobbi Brown ("Being Bobbi Brown")? Remember what a train wreck that turned into? The type of train wreck that the public can't stop gawking at, barring a few seconds to scoff and roll eyes at the conductor. How about the National Enquirer story on her crack cocaine use? Most people said, "How sad" and moved on. This horrible period in her life never totally left her, even wrecking her voice such that when she recently attempted a comeback, she was booed off stage more than once. Where were her supporters then? Nobody, and I mean nobody, who mocked Houston during that time or called her a coke head or crack whore has the right to become emotional at her death now. Sentiment should have poured forth years ago and cries should have spouted, non-judgementally, from mouths about getting that poor woman help. I admit, I was a jackass who partook in the mockery. But I am not clutching my heart now and spewing her songs while moaning that she was such a fantastic person, if only someone had helped her.

I feel for Whitney Houston in the same way I feel for anyone who had a tough life and endured seemingly endless struggles. I will allow the few lifelong fans who were particularly touched by her music and stayed true all these years to get a little emotional at the loss of someone who may have influenced their lives. But you won't find me suddenly clogging up my mp3 player with her songs, and you won't find me glued to my TV trying to get tidbits of news, or starting up conversations about her life and trials. I will view this as I do the passing of any person whom I do not know. I will simply hope that her troubled soul has finally found peace, and avoid dwelling on it. Then I will move on. Because that is what life is about--growing strong and moving on in the face of adversity.